I often get asked about being a stay at home mom and what I do all day. For some reason, I tend to get embarrassed, even though I do so much. It’s like I was caught playing hooky from school. I think it’s a cultural feeling that women are supposed to do everything at home AND more.
I give you working mamas a ton of credit, because I have an eight month old who rarely sleeps through the night and a home that I never feel is clean. And that’s pretty much my only job.
Since it seems to be so mysterious of a job, here’s the truth about SAHM’s:
- It’s the only job that is truly 24/7/365. I haven’t had a day off in 8.5 months.
- “sleeping in” depends on the kid. on the rare occasion that I sleep past 8, it’s making up for the two hours I was up in the middle of the night with a baby who thought it was party time.
- everything you do, you better be able to do while holding or wearing a baby.
- the whole day revolves around the baby’s nap times. if you didn’t get what you wanted done during those forty minutes, well, there’s always tomorrow.
- I’ve “watched” about 5 whole shows on Netflix since having Maggie. truthfully, I’ve probably sat down and viewed like twenty percent of that. I use it like the radio when I’m working around the house. I hate when it’s quiet. If only Pandora would finally come out with season 3 of Serial…
- It feels isolated. even with frequent mom get-togethers, it can get lonely at home. when the majority of your days are spent with a baby, you’ll find yourself having long conversations with the store cashier just for some adult talk.
- the days are long, but it still feels like nothing got done. somehow there’s more laundry than when I started and repainting that room turned into a month long project.
- the best part of the day is after 4pm, when the door opens and your spouse walks in. the worst day can be turned around with a smile and a “how was your day, baby?”
- there are no sick days. feel like you’re going to throw up all day long and have a wicked headache? chug some dayquil and get over it, because that little one is basically the world’s most unsympathetic boss.
- it has the best dress code. you can spend days in your sweats and no one ever has to know. because your Instagram pics are all of your kids anyways, right?
- your children get the best teacher. every single moment is yours to shape and cherish. i love knowing that i am the biggest influence in my child’s life. not trying to be prideful, but it seems like what the mother-child relationship is meant to be.
so if you know a stay at home mom (or dad!), give them encouragement. i haven’t experienced much animosity about choosing to stay at home, but I do often get asked when I’m going back to work. understandably, since I spent so much time and money making myself fit for a career in teaching. right now, i am completely obsessed with my new role as a full time mama and i have a husband who wholly supports my choice and tells me of his appreciation for what I do often. my role may change over the years, but i will always consider these sweet days with my little family as the best of my life.
what you do matters, so do it well.